• Emily Dawson

'Tout Seul'

Updated: May 27




Emily Dawson Age 10, Himalaya Mountains on her way from India to Ladakh, where she lived with her family for 6 weeks & was first properly introduced to Buddhism.

We are all on a journey.


I was born in Dublin, Ireland to my young parents. We moved to England, Bath when I was a baby, it was the 70's things were changing, people were becoming free from societies rules and prejudice, people were starting to live the life only dreamed of in the 60's,


The 70's also brought fear, the end of the world, activation of a nuclear war - studio 54, Disco, Helmut Newton photography, Jane Fonda, sexy dancers on Top of The Pops, freedom, parties and love, or at least sex outside of marriage, love affairs, experimentation and divorce.


By the time I was ten years old it was clear my mother was unhappy with herself, her life, her husband and two children, she had a affair and fell in love with my friends father. My dad deeply loved my mum and so in a bid to save what little they had left of their marriage, they sold up, packed our rucksacks and took us off around the world, around the globe in a time when no-one did this, nobody left a safe life with kids to see the world. But my parents did.


After two years we returned, my parents still in-tact but not to England, Ireland.


Previously and before seeing the world my sister and I had spent many long school holidays in Dublin with my grandparents. Beth my granny was a petite eccentric force of energy, she was an artist, an animal activist and inspired me to be a vegetarian, she only wore shades of purple and believed in the power of pyramids and dowsing.


Granny would remind me daily in her strong Scottish accent - "Observe, observe everything around you, most people don't observe you must observe!"Testing my observing muscle she would ask me to recall what I had seen.


Granny believed in a God and Gratitude, she practiced gratitude every day, she would say - "Be grateful for everything, everyday, you must say, thank you god, thank you god, thank you god!"


And that's how it started!


I became conscious of my own pursuit of purpose, a path of self-discovery when I was 21. Since then I have read, thought, discussed, documented, written, sought and seeked, as well as embarked on many global adventures towards what one might call a calling, one's truth, a path!


“Truth has no path, and that is the beauty of truth, it is living. A dead thing has a path to it because it is static, but when you see that the truth is something living, moving, which has no resting place, which is in no temple, mosque or church, which no religion, no teacher, no philosopher, nobody can lead you to - then you will also see that this living thing is what you actually are.”

Jiddu Krishnamurti. Freedom from the Known


A friend once asked me - having observed my choice of reading material - if I ever wanted to read a fiction book? Surprised at the question - I responded, "Why?" - "To escape", she said. This seemed a strange idea to me as some-how I was always looking to return.


― Marian WIlliamson - says in her book - A Return to Love.

“It takes courage to endure the sharp pains of self-discovery rather than choose to take the dull pain of unconsciousness that would last the rest of our lives.”


“If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step, you know it's not your path. Your own path you make with every step you take. That's why it's your path.” ― Joseph Campbell

I spent the earlier part of my life traveling the world searching for teachers, guru's, masters and teachings, in sacred places, ashrams, retreats, caves, monasteries and mountain tops. More often than not finding myself in the teaching seat, I say this with humility because I did not want to be the teacher, I wanted to be the taught, the devoted student-led by the master guide. I never found this illusionary god-like ideal. Now that I am older I am some-what relieved and of course grateful that I did not meet with this intention, but I admit that I was probably and perhaps still am looking for a father or perhaps mother figure?


Now time has passed and with observation and math I am mid-way through my life, it would seem I have always been and will be possibly lead to walk solo. Surrendering, accepting this has brought me much freedom and the full-time devotion has naturally become my career.


“Your sacred space is where you can find yourself over and over again.”

― Joseph Campbell


One time while I was traveling in an old French colony of India, I stumbled upon a perfumery, in the better half of the well kept secret and 1920’s esque, Southern Indian city of Pondicherry. The perfumer asked that I choose a perfume by smell and that he would then tell me the name of it. I chose a scent I liked, and he told me the title - ‘Tout Seul’ - he translated, 'Walk Alone' I resonated with this, though I felt sad that I was perhaps destined to walk alone.


I was travelling in India solo but I did not intend to remain alone, I was on a pilgrimage to meet with a guru of my own, I wanted direction and purpose, to be guided, I also presumed that eventually and one day to meet with a life partner, someone that stood by me, held my hand, had my back and I theirs. Perhaps the truth is I just wanted to be part of someone, to be seen, loved, don't we all?


As my life unfolded it seems the perfumer was right, or did I just believe this belief, and create my own destiny? the law of attraction and manifestation if you believe in that would say so. In any-case here I am 20 plus years on. I walk alone as a woman, a mother and a global citizen.


“You must give up the life you planned in order to have the life that is waiting for you.” ― Joseph Campbell


I may not have met the love of my life in a polarity of the sex’s! I have however had the good fortune to experience the love of my life, with the blessing of my daughter our life is rich infused with love, she has gifted me a shared love beyond measure, unconditional love, not the romantic conditioned kind, rather the human kind, the love that brings peace and harmony.


It is important to note while on this subject of love - that to love one must learn to see the difference between attachment and love - attachment and love are close in nature, the difference is that attachment causes much pain and suffering, where as love is freedom.


I am rich, rich in life purpose, meaning and prosperous in giving thanks - Grateful for this journey that is infused with love, the sweetest most potent kind, blessed in this life time to be awake, in good health and the freedom to live and create a life we love. There are many with wealth of varied kinds still seeking desperately an illusive ideal and search for happiness.


It turns out Granny Beth was right - the key is Gratitude.


Emily's Tips for a happier life!


1.

Wherever you are and with whomever - love is in your life, focus there, and from there it will - expand - out - into the rest of your life, 'where focus goes energy flows'.


2.

Practice gratitude daily, gratitude is perhaps the most powerful lesson that you could apply right now without much effort, to focus your thought on what you are grateful for in your life creates more to be grateful for in your life.


3.

Get clear on what you love in your life and uncover your own truth and your purpose - live it everyday - just do it - keep doing what you love - make sacrifices and remember nothing comes quickly, without a price - or is easy, accept and keep learning, keep growing, becoming - you will create a life of meaning and self worth.


“Find a place inside where there's joy, and the joy will burn out the pain.”

― Joseph Campbell

Here is an exercise you can do - Takes just a few minutes.


Sitting where you are sitting, you can do this with your eyes closed or open, place your your hands in prayer or place on your heart centre. The act of the hands at heart balances out your right and left brain hemispheres, bringing you into balance and harmony. If you are in a public place you do not need place your hands, just sit and activate your mind.


Now take a moment to think about what you feel grateful for in your life. It can be anything, if you are struggling to find something to feel grateful for - focus on where you are sitting and whats around you - Nature/home/computer/phone /pen you are holding/clothes you are wearing - from there you can expand out into the more meaningful things in your life or vice versa.


Do this exercise in the morning when you wake up and before you go to sleep, it can be done sitting or lying down.


Try it and feel what happens.




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